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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 1W ago

Missing Mother’s Day

I will not see Mom tomorrow, on Mother’s Day. I will be driving back home from a vacation on a North Carolina island. Patrick and I have come here every year since 2008, and our intent is to keep up that annual pace, and perhaps even get down here again in late summer or early [...]
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 2W ago

Wednesday evening, 6 p.m.

I stopped in to see Mom before support group last night. Two visits ago, she was grumpy with the infected salivary gland. The next time I saw her, she was stretched out on a couch in her nightgown after dinner, just lounging until it was time to go to bed. This time, she was in [...]
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 4W ago

Another infection

I had two calls from Alz center nurses last week. I was just leaving a work-related evening reception event at about 8:30 p.m. Wednesday when my cell phone lit up. A night-time call, for some reason, gives me pause. The nurse said staff had just noticed that Mom had a swollen jaw. They had been [......
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 1M ago

Drinking the Kool-Aid

A nurse at the Alz center called last week just to give me a Bonnie update. Mom had been participating in a painting activity – a somewhat rare event – and at some point, she picked up a cup of paint and took a sip of it. The paint was nontoxic and the nurses loaded [...]
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 1M ago

A good grandma

My sister’s daughters were born three years apart, on April 1 and April 4. Mom liked being a grandma, and I think she was good at it. She visited the girls regularly – they lived in suburban New York City for most of their youth before my sister’s family moved to California. Becaus...
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 1M ago

A life lesson

Last night at support group, one of my friends there said I have come a long way. When I asked her to explain, she said I just seem more at peace with what’s going on with Mom, that I talk about her with such affection, and that I talk less about how lonely I feel [...]
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 2M ago

Disorganized and pleasant

I had a very detailed care conference today with several senior staff at the Alz center. There are new regulations dictating nursing home practices, and some of those were kicking in today. We will now complete quarterly forms reiterating what is already in Mom’s chart: She completed a living ...
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 2M ago

Out of sorts

I am concerned that Mom has taken a turn for the grumpy. I visited Sunday just after lunch. She was sitting in a chair by herself, arms crossed and legs crossed. She said something in a huffy way. I pulled up a chair next to her and said I was sorry she was having a [...]
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 2M ago

Family council

Well, I have volunteered to try to lead a new family council at the Alz center. I didn’t really expect that to happen. The staff sent mailings out inviting family members to come in for meetings to discuss the possibility of establishing a family council. I was part of the last group to meet, ...
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A blog inspired by my Mom's brain · 2M ago

A gap in the joy

Oh, the irony. Less than a week after my post about the joy I can still find with Mom despite her disease, I get a shove in the face from her. Is it karma? Was I gloating about the joy? I didn’t intend to. I am very aware of my tendency to see the negative [...]
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