a collection of incoherent ramblings the smartest dumb humor on the web

Many people are familiar with the prophecies of Nostradamus, however, few are familiar with the works of his younger brother Pete. While Nostradamus is so often credited with the predictions of major travesties like the reign of Hitler or the Kennedy assassination, Pete’s prophecies, while stunningl...

I was standing in the grocery store trying to picture what it would be like to not have an imagination. I looked over to say something to my existentialist real estate agent, he sold real estate but the estates were only real to him. I was distracted and my mind started to wander while I [...]

There are people out there who will have you believe that being a carnivore is inhumane in today’s day and age because of the gruesome ways that animals are killed and prepared for eating. But I am here to tell you, that vegetarians are as vicious, if not more, than meat eaters. Meat eaters make [.....

The Missing Shade of Brown – David Hume In the much-less-researched sister paper to his most famous idea “The Missing Shade of Blue,” that discussed Hume’s view of epistemology (he also drafted a work about shades of urine called ‘I-pissed-my-ology’), Hume writes about trying to describe the color o...

It was midnight when the Wilson family was awoken by the smashing and clattering of a lost soul rummaging around their living room. Mr. Wilson came downstairs to see the usual, crucifixes flying, scratches on the walls, things you would expect with any poltergeist. But the Wilson family had just mov...

He was born ten months premature, and widely referred to as a miracle beyond science. His parents decided to name him Blessing, and they gave thanks for their small Blessing. His father was always skeptical about his conception and never fully embraced the child as his own. He was the youngest of 12...

Hell/Detroit (AP) – Wall Street got some startling news yesterday when it was announced that Satan would be filing for Chapter 7 bankruptcy. When asked about the decision Satan told reporters “I am damned if I do and damned if I don’t.” Reports had been circling for the past month of Lucifer’s finan...