My Failings as a Mother
Rain, rain, go away. Today Wee One's class was supposed to go on a field trip. The class was supposed to go on this same field trip last week. Due to bus issues, the trip was rescheduled for today. Little did we know that today would hold record breaking monsoons (well, maybe not that much, but you know how much I like to exaggerate). Rain=no trip to the pumpkin patch (again) for Wee One's class. Cue grumpy and disgruntled three year olds. Cue teachers screaming for xanax and booze.When I walk in to pick him up this afternoon, I felt a chill in the air. I swear I could hear a combination of the Jaws theme and the Twilight Zone song playing in the background."

The State of My Uterus
Uterus. Say that word over and over again a few times. It's kind of an ugly word. Uterus, uterus, uterus. What's the plural? Uteri? Uterii? Uteruses? Sorry, there really is a point to this post. Somewhere. I'm standing in my usual spot behind my computer at work (well, it's officially NOT my spot anymore, but more on that in a bit). Woman comes to the counter, "Oh! You're pregnant!"Um, no, I'm infertile. Not pregnant.No, that's not what I said, but believe me, that's what I thought. Why do people even say that unless the person is strapped into the stirrups giving birth? To make matters worse, I even had on my skinny cords. I. Did. Not. Look. Remot

Trapped, with no possible chance for escape.
I swear, sometimes I think the Blog Gods deliberately put me in situations to see how I will write about them. That happened today. If I hadn't already lost all faith in humanity, it would would have been gone after this episode.I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon. I am actually leaving early enough to where I won't be rushed and should get there in plenty of time, for once. Yay me. Start the car, a funny looking, random light flashes on my dashboard. I try resetting it, car yells at me. Apparently something is funky with my tire. I get out, look at them, they look fine. I call the Husband. He tells me to go to the dealership after my appointment and have them

Karma's a bitch, bitch.
I know I'm guilty, I've done it before. I've judged another mom over her kid's behavior. But honestly, that was a long time ago. Now, I see the poor woman struggling with a miniature tyrant and I offer a friendly smile. Kids suck sometimes. Well, not the kids, but their behavior. We are currently on vacation. My child is NOT a fan of change of any sort. He doesn't do well with changes to his routine. Throw in the fact that he's been sick this week, so he's already out of sorts, oh yeah, and the fact that he's THREE, and you have a recipe for disaster. He's testing his limits, he's NOT listening to a word Husband or I say. And he thinks this is funny. This a

I suppose it's only fair
I admit, I probably deserve it. I did spend three days last week blissfully floating in the Atlantic Ocean, the only care in my head was what to order from the bar next. It's only fair that The Hubs got to go away this weekend. I was excited about my weekend with my favorite three year old. We were going to have a blast. Right.I should have crawled back into bed before I even got out this morning. From the minute the Wee One started knocking on his door, Mommeh! It's time to wake up! I could tell it was going to be quite the day. Upon opening his door and letting him out for the day (I'm only *slightly* paranoid about him getting out of his room and trying to come downs