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Berg's Blog Loren Berg's Blog | My Ramblings and

English - Current Events, Books, Tech
http://lorenberg.wordpress.com
Berg's Blog · 1d ago

Day Brightener – Idiot Sightings – Makes One Wonder How They Do Not Hurt Themselves

I handed the teller at my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00 I said, “May I have large bills, please?” She looked at me and said, “I’m sorry sir, all the bills are the same size.” When I got...
Berg's Blog · 1d ago

Day Brightener – Repairing The Downspout

Last week, my friend Jake’s wife said to him, “Honey, get off your butt and fix the gutter downspout!   It’s going to rain,  so I want it done by tomorrow!” Jake and most of his friends are ...
Berg's Blog · 1d ago

Day Brightener – Maxine Is Back With Twenty-Nine Lines To Make You Smile

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t. 
 2. I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 
 3. Some people are alive only be...
Berg's Blog · 1d ago

Day Brightener – Sometimes The Progression Doesn’t Lead Where You Expect

While enjoying their evening cocktails, the wife asks her husband, in a very seductive voice, “Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?” 
 

”No,” said her husband. 

She gave him ...
Berg's Blog · 5d ago

Friday Frivolity – A Yearly Dementia Test (only 4 questions)

Yep, it’s that time of year again to take our annual senior citizen test. Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it’s important
to keep mentally ...
Berg's Blog · 5d ago

Day Brightener – Remembering Charles Schulz’s Wisdom

Berg's Blog · 5d ago

Day Brightener – Golf Is Not Life, It’s More Important

Four old men went into the pro shop after playing 18 holes of golf.  The pro asked, “Did you guys have a good game today?”  The first old guy said, “Yes, I had three riders today.”  The seco...
Berg's Blog · 5d ago

Day Brightener – A.A.A.D.D. – Know The Symptoms!

Thank GOD there’s a name for this disorder. Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look ove...
Berg's Blog · 1W ago

Day Brightener – The Cynical Philosopher

♦ I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year, not to cause any trouble but shouldn’t that be an even number? ♦ I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom...
Berg's Blog · 1W ago

Day Brightener – Florida Woman Stops Alligator Attack Using A Small Beretta Pistol

Here is another good reason to have a concealed weapons permit. This is a story of self-control and marksmanship by a brave, cool-headed woman with a small pistol against a fierce predator. ...