You’re At The Top Of Your Class! Too Bad No One Will Ever Care.
Holy crapballs. There’s something we’ve got to talk about before we take this relationship any further. No, I’m not going to talk about the six consecutive years I avoided the dentist, or how I almost married a British heroin addict, or

Open Letter: How Can We Break Up Without Me Having To Tell You?
[My mother unearthed several boxes of letters from my childhood. I have no clue why they were saved, but what's mine is yours. And if there is one thing more ridiculous than my current life, it would have to be all the time leading up to my current life.  Hence, I created the Open Letters category of Blunt Delivery] If there’s one thing that I suck at more than commitment, it’s breaking those commitments.  And leaving bowls of half-eaten Eggos in the backseat of my car. But

So I Fell Asleep In A Few Bible Classes
[Again, my absence is alarming.  To roughly sum it up: new job, photo shoots, writing jobs, sinus infection, best friend's dad had a heart attack, family issues, personal issues, etc. I haven't even put up my Christmas decorations, that is how distracted I've been. If you know me, then you know that means I'm about 2 months behind schedule.  I still love you with every ounce of my crispy, blackened heart.] “The magic of first love is our ignorance that it will never end.” You know I thought boys had cooties til I was about 17, right?  Up until that point, I viewed them only

We Can’t Even Afford Boxed Wine
Last November I received an early Christmas present. And I want you to know that I’m currently fighting the urge to chase the rabbit trail topic that is “the Holidays” …even though that rabbit happens to be a big, fluffy, white one that I’m very attracted to.  I’m doing this for you, because I realize it would offend some of your minds if I talked about how my tree is already up.  Or how I might have hypothetically busted out my Christmasy music mix.  Or about how I’m currently wearing my plaid Christmas morning PJs while drinking hot chocolate and eating pancakes. So I’m not going to bring any of that u

Why I Hate Women: Part 6 of 7,893
[ In case you missed the first installment, please check out Why I Hate Women: Let Me Count The Ways and then because I got equal amounts of hater/lover responses to said blog, please check out my rebuttal entitled: Dear Haters, Why Do You Love Me So Much? ] I guess hate is very strong word. When I think of hatred, only a few things come to mind: Nazi Germany, dead beat dads, Frasier, the Da Vinci Code, and