AdVsAd: On Six Tapes or Three”Compact Disc”?
A regular subject of our AdVsAd articles is the ridiculous trend of yesteryear.  Whether they be for toy cowboy six-shooters, pocket calculators that didn’t actually fit in pockets, or asbestos floor tiling, products that society has outgrown by tech or by culture make for some funny-ass commercials. Usually these trends and ads are from long before my time, but a boy has to grow up eventually. One day you wake up, and you realize “I remember stuff I can’t assume everyone else does anymore” and officially you feel old. For example, compilation albums. No, not best-of albums, though some compilation albums call themselves that. Best-ofs can be pretty cool,

Put Down the Duckie!
Another lazy Saturday, Confustadors, and by that I mean Ian’s probably still asleep.  No matter, this past week has marked the 40th Anniversary of Sesame Street, and seeing as how I’m old enough to remember the 20th and 25th anniversaries and really do like the Muppets of yore, as do most of the other writers of ConfuseReviews (except for that heathen Syd, who I’m pretty sure was beaten with boards and told it was Muppets), it marks yet another milestone for us in proving that you goddamn kids these days, with your iPods and your Mariah Carey and your Nintendo Gamecubes! I’ve already gone off abou

NRF: “Golgo 13: Top Secret Episode”
Just another lazy Friday here at the CR Compound. Guess I could nip out and play me an NES game and review it for the site or something, but… I dunno… seems like a lot of effort. Well, what the hell, Ian told me to review this “Golgo 13″ game, saying it was a “classic” or something. Which seems kinda weird to me, because I think I saw an anime movie called Golgo 13 once and it was this indecipherable mess of garbage punctuated b

Crepe Hair, More Like CRAP HAIR GODDAMNIT ALLFURCKKKKK
Merry Christmas, Confusionauts! That’s right, it’s Christmas already, which you’d know if you’ve been into any public place which sells goods in the last four days since Halloween. A couple years ago they discreetly passed a law saying that Christmas lasts for two whole months now. Personally, I’m overjoyed! There’s absolutely nothing I love more than having the most pervasive saccharin-sweet holiday pushed down my struggling maw for months at a time! I’m thinking that if I go caroling here soon, I’ll be able to hear both Christmas carols AND possibly get some leftover Halloween candy! It’s a win-win! And when I end up in a pool of my

My Position on Missionaries (Tee hee)
You can push your friends, and you can push your nose (and I guess you can push your friends’ noses, if you’ve had too much to drink), but push your faith and I’ll push your buttons. I consider it not just a duty, but a finely honed skill, of which I am quite proud. Allow me to explain. Since the dawn of man, hundreds of thousands of years ago, eons and eons prehistoric through generations beyond number… I’ve been in college. Or at least it feels that way sometimes. I’ve attended university so long, when I’m done paying back my student loans it’ll wipe out the national deficit. So long that my first R.A. was Socrates. So long that I