water critics
Besides the ridiculous habit of someone having to sit beside Evan until he falls asleep every night, both Evan and his sister demand a cup of water at their bedside. I’m sure it’s because I allowed them to nurse themselves to sleep or something else I did wrong, but as with many things, this is not a battle I want to fight right now. Lately, the cup of water has evolved into something of a drink order. Evan: “I need a cup of water with THREE ice cubes.” Amy: “I need a cup of water with ONE ice cube.” When you tiptoe back in their dark room and put the

Amy says:
Amy: “I got an E+ on my book of school safety rules.” Me: “That’s wonderful. What were the rules?” Amy: “Umm, I can only remember one.” Me: “What is it?” Amy: “Never punch people in the face.”

old AND fat
Noah: “It’s older than YOU? Wow! That’s really old.” Doug: “You know that drink you like so much? They make a low calorie version that you really need to try.” I will be sleeping in a tent in the backyard from now on. I hope the wireless is accessible from there.

Evan brought me a “flower”

swim