...
Normally when I feel this way, I post to my private blog.  It's just not the sort of thing I post publically because it feels...  cheap.  I guess I am throwing it out there because, well, keeping it to myself hasn't done me any good, so I assume putting it out there can't hurt much, either. I miss her.  I miss her so much it hurts.  I catch myself saying something she would say and I damn near burst into tears.  But, as always, I don't.  I just dummy up.  Or shut down.  It's funny.  I know DH has asked me things about her or that would turn the conversation towards her...  And I know I swore my babies would know her through me, but I have f

I need a mental health day!
Along with being seriously under-valued, under-paid, under-appreciated, and sleep deprived, one thing the career of motherhood lacks is mental health days.  I desperately need time with myself and myself alone to evaluate, prioritize, and tackle.  Bills.  One of our credit cards is jumping to 29.99% in response to Obama's fair credit laws.  We are not maxxed out, have never made a late or partial payment, and yet, if we keep this card, we will be paying 30% interest.  Guess which card will no longer have a place in our wallets?  That leaves us a single credit card that is just below its limit.  It has a phenomenal rate, though...  we have a hole in our wall wit

While I'm Falling
An entertaining diversion, October 27, 2009 By  Mental Mommy "Mental Mommy"

100 Days of Gratitude
I wanted to make sure that on my 100th day of gratitude, I really got it.  I didn't want to record appreciation for something flippant or fleeting.  As I was thinking about what I am most grateful for, it seemed very obvious.  Today I am grateful for never having to think too long or too hard about thing to be grateful for.  I have more than enough "things" in my life.  While we may be less inconvenienced if we owned another car, we have a reliable vehicle.  While we may need to replace our roof, for now, we are dry and happy with our current roof.  We may not have an iPhone or a laptop, but we've more than enough toys and gadgets to keep us busy.

Winding Roads
I am researching my path...  MEAC schools aren't exactly prevalent, and none of them are local.  Not all of them offer distance learning, and the one that I thought I liked requires you to be there more often than is feesible for me.  I admit...  I am a bit overwhelmed and discouraged.  It took me 30 minutes just to figure out what I needed to have already done before I could apply to one school.  In my defense, it listed the prerequisites in another place...  Whatever.  Anyway, I am still excited, but now I feel like I have nothing to funnel all my energy into and it's just wasting away.  My kids are looking at me like I am insane.  We've been painting and stamp