In which I lose a battle, but not the war

My trend-setting poodle cut

In which I display my patchwork

Terror for Tigers
When I was a young cat I wanted to be a tiger. I wanted to be the biggest, stripeyest, snarlingest tiger in the world. In a few years time I can probably wrap myself in a black and yellow coat in faux fur and be the only tiger in the world. There are fewer than 5,000 tigers left! The way the slaughter continues, all of them could be gone by 2012. In a cruel twist of fate, the Siberian tigers who are down to 500 in numbers, are more likely to survive. Though their nor

Fattest Cat in the World
This once petite little puss is now known as the heaviest in the world. She weighs over thirteen kilograms, two and a half stone, and has been renamed Chubby. Her person, Xu Jirong, of China’s Shandong province, says the maltreated moggy puts on more than two pounds every year. Someone should tell this man that cats shouldn’t overeat! Someone should tell the cat too. Lay off the Roast Pork Dumplings and the Peking Duck, Chubby. Enough is enough!

Replace me not with a Robot Cat
It’s absolutely appalling! Sega Toys has been selling life-like (well, almost) robo-cats in Japan for about 3 years now. The latest model is Venus - designed like a Norwegian Forest Cat. The robo-cat is equipped with touch sensors that let it engage in such real-life feline behaviour as purring, moving its legs when people rub its belly and other nauseatingly sweet responses. It gets worse! Apparently you can say “There, there” (in Japanese) and it purrs! And, heaven save us all, this plastic and steel would-be usurp