Sarah and the Goon Squad
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| Blog Name: | Sarah and the Goon Squad |
| Url: | http://sarahandthegoonsquad.com/ |
| Language: | English |
| Topics: | twins, parenting, football |
| Description: | |
| Popularity: | 288 Followers |
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Better Make Mine a Double
I have twins… No really, make mine a double. And if you need one of these you should talk to my friend Kristen.
I have twins… No really, make mine a double. And if you need one of these you should talk to my friend Kristen.
I’m Going to Vote, but I am Still Mad at You
Dear Everybody Running for Everything, At this point the best way to earn my vote is to promise to propose legislation to make all those damn automated phone calls telling me who I should vote for illegal. Thank you for your time. Sincerely, Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah ps – Stop calling my house after 8:30 PM, I have little kids. I hate you all.
Dear Everybody Running for Everything, At this point the best way to earn my vote is to promise to propose legislation to make all those damn automated phone calls telling me who I should vote for illegal. Thank you for your time. Sincerely, Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah ps – Stop calling my house after 8:30 PM, I have little kids. I hate you all.
On Handwriting
This is for Beth. Feel free to play along.
This is for Beth. Feel free to play along.
Quitters Never Win
Last night I dreamed that I started smoking again. It was such a realistic dream that I can tell you exactly how many cigarettes I smoked. Three. I woke up feeling terrible about myself. When will this stop? My Mom quit smoking in 1980. It has been almost 30 years and I remain under strict instructions that whenever the doctors tell her that she is going to die (she is fine now, she has been telling us this for years) I am t
Last night I dreamed that I started smoking again. It was such a realistic dream that I can tell you exactly how many cigarettes I smoked. Three. I woke up feeling terrible about myself. When will this stop? My Mom quit smoking in 1980. It has been almost 30 years and I remain under strict instructions that whenever the doctors tell her that she is going to die (she is fine now, she has been telling us this for years) I am t
I Am Not A Crook
I am not a criminal. I rarely break the law. Sure, I occasionally exceed the speed limit but other than traffic offenses 90% of the laws I have broken in my life have involved under-aged drinking. It has been a while since I have done anything that could get me in trouble with the law. So why, why, why do I get nervous when I have to pass through the security gates leaving the library? It isn’t like I am stealing free books. Just me then?
I am not a criminal. I rarely break the law. Sure, I occasionally exceed the speed limit but other than traffic offenses 90% of the laws I have broken in my life have involved under-aged drinking. It has been a while since I have done anything that could get me in trouble with the law. So why, why, why do I get nervous when I have to pass through the security gates leaving the library? It isn’t like I am stealing free books. Just me then?
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