“Twilight” Can Kiss My Ass, And So Can These.
I’m gonna get crucified for this review, I can feel it.  No, not by you, faithful and peace loving readers–from the other Gurus, Matty & Scotty.  They’re not gonna like what I’m about to say. First, the context.  Check these out, Haribo Vampires:     Hard to see what’s going on with them through the bag, but here’s a closer look:  

Chocri Khan Let Me Rock You Chocri Khan
“…the dark bar was probably the best I’ve ever had.” That’s what your favorite reviewer Jonny said about the chocolate bars he ordered from make-your-own-chocolate-bar site, chocri. (This site isn’t yet available to the unwashed masses — just for dirtbags like us who spend valuable time writing and talking about sweets. But you can read about the purveyor’s escapades until the buy-site is open to the public.) ok – let’s take a step back. It’s Xmas-ish, you’re tired of buying the same ol’ crappy gifts so you decide this yea

Jolly Rancher Hard Candies: Best In Class
It all started back in the dizzle,  @ 1977.  Me, Matt, Kevin & Darren, crusing to the local grocery store and loading up on cheap candy for the day.  Wacky Wafers?  Check.  Sweet Tarts?  Double Check.  Jolly Rancher Sticks?  Hells Yes.  Raspberry, Apple, Watermelon, Fruit Punch, Pink Lemonade, and of course, Fire.  Always the cheapest candy, and always the best flavored.  Bright, sharp, tangy, accurate fruit tastes, all packaged in handy sticks: unwrap some now, and save some for later.  Speaking of-you can add Now n’ Laters to the list above.  Still…JR’s were the star.

Chock Full Of Eastern Promise, and Goo!
Last Monday was a good day.  Sure, I had lost my fantasy football matchup the weekend before, and yes, I was still full of self loathing and disdain, but…that’s just Monday, right?  The reason this particular Monday was so excellent is due to the fact that not one, not two, but three of my co-workers randomly dropped by my office to bring me candy to review.  In my book, that makes a good day.  First up?  The UK’s “Turkish Delight”.

Tropical Stormz Tootsie Pops Lollipops, Fantasy Foootball Style
Like many great things, it began with fantasy football. Jonny Guru, Matty Guru and I, Matty Jr. Guru, were at our friend Lang’s house, drafting for our football league. I’m not going to go into the details of the draft, because that might even bore me, but it was a good, rollicking time had by all. (Except that moment when I drafted Darren McFadden, but we’re not going to revisit that now.) But as memorable as the draft was for me, the real standout was not the fact that I got Adrian Peterson with the first pick, but instead the discovery of Tropical Stormz.