An Interview with Pat Guppy - Part III

An Interview with Pat Guppy - Part II

An Interview with Pat Guppy - Part I

Chapter one preview on Scribd
I am always fiddling with widgets I find on the Internet, and as Scribd has been tweeted about so much on Twitter I thought I'd give it a go. So here we go... the first chapter of 'The Wonderful Demise of Benjamin Arnold Guppy', in a swish little display box for your leisurely perusal. You can, of course, view it in full screen mode... nobody expects you to go out and purchase a set of magnificatious peepers just to read an excerpt.

A new variety of turnip causes controversy
The Rare and Unusual Varieties department of the Sea View Fruit and Vegetable Growers Association has today announced that a new variety of turnip has finally been grown that is fit to carry the Benjamin Arnold Guppy name - the Brassica Benjamina Guppicus. The new variety is slightly larger than other turnips, with incredibly dense foliage, and it boasts the unusual ability to throw itself over walls when angered. Two years of research have gone into the project, which cost in the region of a quarter of a million pounds. The development of this new variety was funded by the Sea View Environmental Preservation Fund, which has claimed that the turnip is close to becoming an e

Pat Guppy is twittering with glee
Pat Enid Guppy has joined Twitter and you can follow her comings and goings right here. Feeling that she is too remote from her numerous (in the millions being a conservative estimate) adoring fans across the globe, she is making this move in an attempt to connect with each and every one of them... as long as they are not common, love the Queen as much as she does,

Book signing - Weston-super-Mare
On November 19th, Waterstone's booksellers will be helping to launch late-night shopping at The Sovereign Centre in Weston-super-Mare by holding a book signing event. I've been invited to take part, so I will be there between 3:30 and 8:30pm to sign copies of 'The Wonderful Demise of Benjamin Arnold Guppy' (and 'Utamaro Revealed', if you have an interest in Japanese art as well as murdering your neighbours in cold blood). Do come along and say 'ho ho ho' if you're in the area.Waterstone's Booksellers, Unit

The lost poems of Benjamin Arnold Guppy - Part II
Sold at a recent Sotheby's auction for a whopping great big £2.36, and now in the hands of a private collector. Reproduced here for the first time, I give you two more lost poems by the late Benjamin Arnold Guppy.'Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me'Why hast thou forsaken me,When I love you oh so much,How I long to feel you close to me,To tremble at your touch.Nights spent alone,Without you snuggled up to me in bed,Days spent alone,In misery whilst prostrate in my shed.I search for you when shopping,Chase shadows down empty aisles,Which causes me discomfort,As I still suffer from p