Not Jerking Off
Depression is an ugly word, which is okay because so many uggos are depressed. For the pretty people out there, you don't have to say "depressed" anymore! From now on, just say that you're not jerking off. What could be better?!Point the first - Fact: You're so depressed you can't even bring yourself to jerk off. A combination of booze, pills, too much tv, not enough sleep, too many drive-thru visits, and not enough intimate physical contact has told your libido to take a hike. Touching yourself has taken on all the appeal of answering your ringing cellphone at 8AM on a Sunday.

For shame
Fie on us for not keeping you all in the loop, I know.But, really, did you want to read about our daynightmaring? No one daynightmares like we do - cobras in our dicks, girls decaying while we fuck them (with or without cobra-dicks), Christmastime dinners with family - y'know!? Horrible, horrible stuff.There have been some shows that we haven't told you about in this blogosphere. Not that we were embarrassed - like we donned yarmulkes and pretended to be Jewish for the Chabad Telethon (have you seen that clip of Soleil Moon Frye and Mayim Bialik on the telethon?) - just not in the mood for interacting with you all electronically. Besides, who wants to see comedy