Henpecked
England! Land of red telephone booths... Banburgh Fine fayre... And fierce creatures. Anguished of Alnwick Castle  We had a great day pootling down the Northumberland Coast

Heatwave
It was a mighty 26 degrees here yesterday (79F), which pretty much constitutes a heatwave in Dunfermline. Sunglasses were needed in the high street to combat the blinding glare from pale topless men. Anything higher than 15 degrees then off come the jumpers and jackets and out come the bellies, concave or corpulent. At the newsagents. Down at the park the hillside was strewn with more bare-chested bodies. Birds sang and unprotected Scottish skin barbecued. On the bus the old ladies who moaned about the endless winter last week now moa

Trouble in Paradise
We've moved house again; a little house with rural views to the rear complete with enormous pile of cow shite....

On the X26 to Glasgow
Drunk guy just sat down next to a bookreading girl on the bus. BOOK GIRL: You are reeking of drink!...

I Like Budgies
Following on from the whole Baby or Budgie debate, while in Australia I found evidence that Dr G and I...