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You can take her home now... · 5d ago

Week 257- day time discos, shit reviews and holidaying like its 1983...

I’ve just been on a holiday for four nights for eighty quid for a family of four.Let me recap. Four nights. Eighty quid. Four of us.That’s a fiver each a night. They say you get what you pay...
You can take her home now... · 3W ago

Week 254- marriage, Michael Jackson and Man in the Mirror...

I’m going to be 40 next year.I’m getting married in four months.I have two children under the age of six.I’m supposed to be a grown up.But something happens after a couple of beers on a nigh...
You can take her home now... · 1M ago

Week 253- eyeballs, A and E and our excellent NHS...

So- date night. Take away. Done. Bottle of wine. Done.Mind-numbing film that doesn’t involve too much thinking.Done and done.In fact the movie was so successfully dull that I nodded off half...
You can take her home now... · 1M ago

Week 252- bathrooms, B and Q and brilliant ideas...

You know how you have those moments when everything comes together and you feel all content and calm, and look at your family and home and think, yep, I’ve got this shit nailed?No. Me neithe...
You can take her home now... · 1M ago

Week 250- potties, poo and pissing on the table...

I had forgotten how 100% disgusting potty training it. I think it’s like birth. Your brain cancels out the pain; otherwise you’d insist that your child wears a nappy until they turn eighteen...
You can take her home now... · 2M ago

Week 248- tiny drunks, terrible twos and totally losing your shit...

Having small children is sometimes like living with a house full of drunks. The speed in which they change their opinions, or love you then think you’re a dick a moment later is incredible a...
You can take her home now... · 3M ago

Week 244- getting angry and using it...

This has been the most fearful and yet empowering few days to be a woman.We now have a hateful, dangerous misogynist in the most powerful position in the world. He has no respect for women, ...
You can take her home now... · 3M ago

Week 243- getting trashed, getting bitten and getting on the resolution train in week two...

You know when you have one of those calm Christmases where everything goes like clockwork, you feel relaxed and ready for the New Year, you make achievable, ambitious resolutions and start t...
You can take her home now... · 4M ago

Week 239- front room discos and eating like it's Christmas...

I am so getting into this Christmas lark, way more than the children. They just want to sit off and watch telly but recently we’ve started to have a Christmas disco. By disco I mean I put on...
You can take her home now... · 4M ago

Week 238- weddings, wind and wearing bad sports bras...

So, isn’t the deal with joining a gym that you instantly lose a stone, and then several subsequent pounds every time you put a pair of trainers on?I’m back at my old gym.By ‘back at’ I mean ...